A Boring Mouse




A kiddo on the ward today:

Kiddo: "you know, I asked my mum why you were a girl with a beard."

[Cue parents turning bright red with anxiety]

Kiddo: "Mummy said you're not a girl, you're a boy who's currently transforming like an avatar in a video game."

Me: *slow blinking while figuring out where this is going*

Kiddo: "My favourite avatars have wings or horns. Are you going to get wings?"

Me: *trying not to laugh* I haven't thought about getting wings. I think they're only available as decoration at the moment, like necklaces. I don't think we've figured out the science to make usable, actually attached to us wings."

Kiddo: "Oh. No tails then?"

Me: *shakes head sadly*

Kiddo: "So, what are you transforming?"

Me: "Well, at the moment I'm working on my beard."

Kiddo: "But that's boring! You should at least get some glowing eyes or change your hair."

Me: "Noted. Avoid boring. Boring is bad. I shall make myself wild and interesting only." 

Kiddo: *Nods sagely*

[Pan over to parents dying with embarrassment in the corner.]

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